According to the UK Daily Telegraph, “George III’s coronation took place on September 22, 1761, and was described by contemporary observers as “a complete shambles” and a “fiasco” after the heralds forgot their lines, the dean omitted to provide any chairs for the King, or Queen Charlotte and the canopy was mislaid along with the Sword of State. Meanwhile, the King removed the crown at the wrong moment and a large diamond fell from its setting, prompting a frantic search”. Queen Victoria’s 1838 five-hour coronation has been described as “the last of the botched coronations”. We may be thankful for this.

On May 6th King Charles III was crowned. I’m not a royalist but did take time out to watch the service – for us in eastern Australia, held at a very civilised 8.00p.m. AEST. It’s the first coronation to take place in my near seventy-year life and if King Charles lives as long as his father and I as long as mine, it will be the only one I witness. In contrast, my dad lived through four, not that he’d have been conscious of the first. The four:

Edward VII (and Queen Alexandra)

Like Charles III, Edward spent decades in waiting. As Queen Victoria’s eldest son, ‘Bertie’, he was heir apparent from birth (1841), succeeding to the throne, on 22nd January 1901. Although just 59, obesity and heavy smoking had aged him. His coronation was set for 26th June 1902. Two days before he was diagnosed with appendicitis so it had to be postponed. Many dignitaries returned home. The deferred coronation took place on 9th August.

Why was this coronation notable? At university we learned about this coronation … in contract law class. Many people with rooms overlooking the processional route rented them out for the occasion. When the coronation was postponed, the would-be spectators wanted their money back and a spate of law cases followed. Generally they succeeded if the contract implicitly or expressly stated that the room hire was for the purpose of viewing the proceedings, not otherwise.

George V (and Queen Mary)

George was not born to reign. He became the heir to the throne in 1892, aged 26, on the death of his older brother, Prince Albert. He became king on the death of his father, 6th May 1910, with his coronation taking place on 22nd June 1911. His 25-year reign was marked by the Great War and the Depression. He died on 20th January 1936 aged 70.

Why was this coronation notable? The guest list saw an assemblage of European royalty that would never be replicated. Within ten years the map of Europe would be redrawn. The VIP list included the German Crown Prince (the King’s first cousin once removed), the Grand Duke of Hesse (the King’s first cousin), Prince Henry of Prussia (another first cousin), the Crown Prince of Denmark (another first cousin), the Crown Prince of Sweden (another first cousin), Archduke Karl of Austria, the Crown Prince of Romania (yet another first cousin), Grand Duke Boris Vladimirovich of Russia, Infante Ferdinand of Spain, the Crown Prince of Serbia, the Prince of the Netherlands and many more

Edward VIII

Why was this coronation notable? Because it didn’t happen: Edward’s ten-month reign ended with his abdication on 10th December 1936. By then plans for his coronation, set for 12th May 1937 were well in hand. But they weren’t wasted …

George VI (and Queen Elizabeth)

On Edward VIII’s abdication the unready and reluctant Prince Albert found himself king, taking the name “George VI” to emphasise continuity with his father. With so many arrangements already made, his coronation took place on 12th May 1937. Just over two years later the country was again at war. “Cometh the hour, cometh the man” – certainly true of WW2 and George VI. The stress of wartime leadership coupled with the effects of heavy smoking led to his premature death on 6th February 1952.

Why was this coronation notable? The coronation procession (but not the ceremony inside the abbey) was broadcast on TV, the country’s first major outside broadcast – at the time there were probably no more than 1,000 TV sets in the UK perhaps watched by 10,000 people. It was also the first coronation to be filmed, and the first to be broadcast on radio.

Elizabeth II

For her first ten years there was little expectation that Elizabeth would in time become queen. Then the abdication of her uncle moved her up the line of succession, to become heir presumptive (presumptive because in theory her parents could have produced a son who would have become heir apparent). After years of war and the austerity that followed, the new Elizabethan age was greeted with enthusiasm.

Why was this coronation notable? The 2nd June 1953 coronation was televised with more than half the adult population (viewer estimates vary: 20-27 million) watching, many on sets obtained specifically for that purpose. It would be the last coronation for nearly seventy years.

And the only coronation that most of us have witnessed:

King Charles III (and Queen Camilla)

In contrast to Queen Elizabeth’s three hour ceremony watched by 8,000 guests, Charles’ coronation was a slimmed down affair, with the ceremony lasting about an hour with only 2,000 guests present. In spite of the much larger population, UK viewer figures are put at around 20 million, much lower than the 29 million who watched Queen Elizabeth’s funeral.

Why was this coronation notable? Those participating included Vincent Nichols, the Roman Catholic Cardinal Archbishop of Westminster, and Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist, Hindu and Sikh members of the House of Lords.

One of my late mother’s pastimes, inherited from her father, was investing in shares – not so much to make money but for to add interest to life. Going to company AGMs was for her – and many others of pension age – a social thing rather than an opportunity to grill the board with incisive questions. In early times some companies – RHM and Young’s Brewery to name but two –  followed their AGMs with a really good lunch (the real reason many went!) but these ended when the host’s hospitality was abused – what sort of person goes to an AGM and fills their briefcase with bottles of spirits or food from the buffet? As for me I’ve not followed in her footsteps. My three incursions into the world of shares have been conspicuous failures!

Firstly, in the 1990s, came Pathfinder Repossessions. After the UK’s Conservative government (correctly) removed double tax relief on mortgages but (mistakenly) deferred bringing this change in , there was an almighty housing boom, followed by a rise in interest rates and a crash, with many people having their houses repossessed. At the same time the government introduced the BES (Business Expansion Scheme): all profits made from investing in such companies were tax free.

One such company was Pathfinder Repossessions. The story was a good one. As the New York Times explained (Feb 1992): “Their aim is to snap up homes at auction, quickly refurbish and rent them, and then sell them off in four or five years”. Five years later, with property prices having gone up by around 17% and all the profits from renting there should have been a useful return. But in contravention of the statement in the original prospectus ‘that the Directors will endeavour to facilitate the realisation by Investors of their investment at the end of five years‘ the company’s money, supplemented by significant borrowings, had been invested in a speculative new-build scheme in Wimbledon. I made my opinions clear at the AGM, noting “The Profit and Loss account for 1996-97 show sales of £387,000, which I presume is rental income from properties still owned by the company. By some sleight of hand all but £3,000 of this has been spent on management and administrative expenses”. The chairman responded with some very sarcastic comments.

A few months later Pathfinder Repossessions was taken over by Pathfinder Properties. At least I didn’t lose my money. I invested £2500 and got back £1,882 in cash and shares in Pathfinder Properties worth around £871, net total £2,753, for £2,500 invested in 1992 – a five year period when savings interest rates were around 5-6%. Some people made a lot of money out of Pathfinder, just not the shareholders.

Skip a few years to the excesses of the dotcom boom. All sorts of companies were being set up from scratch and were soon to make millionaires of their founders even though they weren’t making money. The key to this was to get a share floatation, a not inexpensive process. Step forward Durlacher, a long established stockbrokers. The deal was simple – payment in kind: Durlacher would float your company in exchange for a small proportion of the share capital. The attraction for people like me was that by investing in Durlacher you were buying into a parcel of dotcom companies, knowing that the due diligence had been done by supposedly very clever people. So I put some money into Durlacher shares. They went up. Repeat two or three times.

And then …. Reality caught up. As the Telegraph reported: “Durlacher, a star in the dotcom boom when it was valued at £2.3 billion and was on the brink of joining the FTSE 100 index, is now worth less than £5m after seeing its shares plummet from a peak of 441p nearly three years ago. Yesterday, the shares fell a further 0.11p to a new low of 0.82p after it said a review by KPMG had revealed its net assets are now less than half its called-up share capital”. Of course I should have set a stop loss and bailed at an early stage but didn’t. I’m not sure now how much I’d invested – probably a few thousand pounds – but the final insult was that my holding was now worth less than Charles Schwab’s minimum £15 deal. Fortunately one of their staff took pity on me and let me get my last few pounds out.

And so to Australia. Through a friend I heard about a small company called Ironclad Mining. Another great story: they had the rights to mine iron ore at Wilcherry Hill, South Australia. The pitch: “The project has forecast high rates of return from development due to the quality of the product likely to be produced from Wilcherry…. Stage 1 will aim to produce a high quality, low contaminant Direct Shipping Ore (DSO) 62% Fe product which, can be produced by simple low cost, dry methods such as crushing, screening and dry magnetic separation. It is expected that Stage 1(a), which is being fast-tracked into production by the end of this year, is likely to deliver up to two million tonnes a year of DSO ore for at least three years”. Millions of dollars later lots of exploratory drilling had been done, a never-used miners compound built and a shipping barge procured. But with a fall in iron ore prices the shareholders weren’t up for any more rights issues. The company was folded into Tyranna Resources. ASX:TYX, price: 0.007 AUD, Market Cap: $8.98 m (as at 18.09.21). As for myself, I turned $7272 into $306!

TL;DR: Never take investment advice from me!